Chicago to Fargo!

Neither Bob nor I remember that first night after Chicago. I think we both slept in the van. Bob has a hammock that he hangs and I usually sleep in the bushes.
OH! I REMEMBER!
We were at a rest area. I forgot to mention that before leaving Chicago we found over 20 pounds of avocados on our way out of Chicago! After cutting away the bad parts we still about 10 pounds of Guacamole! We pulled out the jar of salsa that Bob's mom gave him and some chips and ate Guac all day. It was all I ate that day, Guac, Chipolte salsa, chips and slightly stale bread. It was glorious! In the evening we stopped at a rest area to streach and play. We set up Bob's new slack line for the first time. It was great, I was not excited about getting back in the van. As we were readying ourselves we noted a faint persistent smell of dog shit. We checked our selves well, but I was still fairly certain it was on me. It turns out that it wasn't, just that the entire area smelled of it, ambiently. Just before taking off a prostitute showed up with her John and we found a drip under the Van. We fretted for quite a while before deciding that the drip spot was not from us and that we must have parked on top of the leak without noticing it. It was only a few hours later, I was just falling asleep in the passenger seat when Bob pulled over to rest. He got out to strech and smelled the diesel from the cracked fuel line. The same fuel line we just replaced. We GPS'ed a hardwear store and cautiously drove to it. I was not in the mood to scout a hidden campsite in down town BFE so I laid out in an open lot and went to sleep.

I was awoken the next morning by a drunken indian. “You OK man?”. “Yeah.” “You old enough to drink?” “Yeah.” “Will you go buy me something from the liquor store?” “What? Your not old enough to drink?” He obviously was, maybe in his late 50's or maybe just a hard 40. We got to know this old drunk well. His name was Jude and he had hitched in to town to go to court, a day to soon.

This just in LIVE from the road Quote of the day. “Daniel:I wonder what that is? Bob:Chuch, that's my guess... Maybe a movie theater.”

Bob had got some epoxy and tried to patch the small crack in the line. We would have to wait 6-8 hours so as Bob napped I walked around town, listening to music and playing with my energetic field and currents, spinning and spiralling, jumping, jolting, and throwing the flowing sense of potential to the beat of Mat and Kim. I walked around town, met some nice people and found a river to read by. When the sun started to come down Bob and I played a game of Go and I put up a blog post.

I slept that night in a well hidden alleyway and woke up to rain on my face. I ran in the early morning to the van and slept the rest of the day away. I was looking forward to another nice day in Mahnomen, MN but the next two days it just rained... Bob and I slept a lot, making up for the lack of sleep on the road, and played go in the library and the Casino. The Casino is huge, well, it's not that big really, but it's bigger then the downtown itself so it Seems huge, in context. The second night Jude and his friend Greg drunkenly came by the van and tried to impose their hospitality on us. We agreed to come over to dinner the next night and had a surprisingly nice time along with a nice simple meal and a shower. I slept the last night in a storage room of an abandoned house that had a small leak in the roof so I set my tarp above me. Much to my dismay my tarp, which I used for almost every night for 6 months and sporadically for the rest of last year was... Suprise, suprise... Worn out. I am happy that I chose to sleep in the room. If I slept only with that tarp I would have been soaked through. Bob had been trying to get a hold of his parts dealer to no avail and very dramatically at the last moment before Bob spent all of his extra money on the part and spare from a dealership, he called. Bob had literally just picked up my phone to make the call. We were shouting from joy in the library. The librarian was happy for us and didn't scold us. She was a substitute librarian. The regular librarian, Lois, was on strike after her boss had been ever so disrespectful. We liked Lois. When I first went to the Library I noticed that she offered Coffee so we brought some coffee to donate. Lois is on Couch Surfing.com so if you are passing through you should look her up.

We had the brilliant idea to tow the van to Fargo, ND both to get the parts a day earlier and to get out of Mahnomen.

Owen offered us his couch in a large house with 4 roommates. It was cold when we arrived so as Bob finished up with the tow and got the van in the driveway I went to the house. A very gay man opened the door. My gaydar is not that good but the look he gave me was unmistakable. I smiled knowingly and came in. Two more very gay men were waiting inside. After some chit chat Bob and I started cooking dinner then settled in to watch the Amazing Boosh or something like that. It was hilarious and after a few hours of laughing with the guys and side conversation I felt perfectly at home. The party was starting up so Bob went out to the van to sleep and since I knew I would not be sleeping for quite some time I asked Andrew to make me a drink... The party was pretty great. Andrew and I played Go in the smoking room as drunkards wandered about. Andrew had tried to learn go before so he picked up the basic lessons quickly. I was sitting on the arm of a chair and and Owen sat in the chair and though I moved my legs out of his way he put them on his lap. I moved them again and he moved them again. I thought for a moment and checked in with my feelings, laughed at him and relaxed. Before long I was happy that Owen was there. All of a sudden I was in the center of the party. People would come to pay their respects to Owen and I appreciated his way with them. He was as Bob noted a natural born Concierge. And the few cute girls in the party who had been ignoring me, as I had been them, came to find out who I was. I never understood homophobia. First of all, if you are in a mixed room say 8 dudes, 12 gay guys, 4 cute girls 3 other girls your odds of getting laid are good. Most of the guys are not in competition, and if they like you they can do a lot to help you. Secondly, I guess the worry is that they will hit on you. Two things here: first of all you can feel flattered, and secondly it is good to see how much men objectify sex. I think that from spending time with gay men I can understand how a woman feels when I want to have sex with her and she doesn't feel that way towards me. I feel like I may have written this before but it this has made such a profound impact on me. Anyway, back at the party, all of a sudden the lights go off and everyone is screaming. A few minutes later the lights come back on, and off and on, off, on, off and on. I found out later that someone had stolen the fuses. This was probably to avoid attention while they were stealing Owens laptop and a 3ft statue of the Eiffel Tower and my jacket, with $40 in the pocket.

The next day we met with Molly, another couch surfer, for coffee. The Raven is a typical used bookstore/ coffee shop. We went to the only health food store in Fargo's dumpster. And as we walked back home Molly picked up pigeon feathers for her hair. We made a great lunch and while Molly went home Bob, Andrew, and I played games. Molly came back with her roommate Mary. There was a game of scrabble as I danced. After the game Mary danced with me and I ended up crawling up on her shoulders. You can see the pictures on facebook. She is a small girl with a big fro. It was a great scene.

The next day we went to Space Aliens Bar and Grill. Wow. One of Andrew friends recognized Owen and gave us a bunch of coins for the arcade. When we got home it was raining. Unfortunately canceling my biking plans with Molly. We all sat around and causally watched “The story of O” as we did other things. I hoped that Molly and Mary would come over but they never did. I have, for the most part, stopped masturbating. I had not noticed much effect until this day, both Moly and Mary are really cute. When I gave a massage to Molly the night before I felt very erotic which is not unusual for a causal massage at a party setting. The strange part was how often I thought about her the next day. I felt sad that she didn't call and I wanted to call her. A few weeks ago I would have called without any thought. What could be the problem? If she is attracted to me then 'fireworks' and if not then we enjoy ourselves in other ways. So why didn't I call? As I see it there are three kinds of fasts. One, DON'T DO IT. Two, only do it in a particular way. Three, don't do it or not do it. The third kind is the most tricky. What is doing and not doing? Who is doing and where does the doing come from? What does this have to do with sex? If I am arrested with ambivalence then I can watch without intentional action. I can watch habitual action and habitual responses to desire. Anyway, she didn't call. We took off the next day, I was feeling a little sad, “it's hormonal” I told Bob. One of the reasons why I am exploring my sexuality in this new way is because of how much I associate my sexuality with self worth. It makes sense in a way and it seems very common, but not all pervasive. What are the conditions of that? I want to be happy and if I should look into this. I practiced vippasana and contemplated my experience and cheered up. There was nothing to be done. May as well be happy.